Oh, hey love.

What's up?
I had a wonderful day :)
It was a great ending to a sucky week.

But anyways.
I've had a lot on my mind lately, just not enough courage to actually say/ask the things I need to.
Whateverr.

Perfectly lonely.

"You kind of go crazy when Brenton's not around, don't you?"

"Yeah, I've realized that."

"That's not good."

"So I've heard."

Life ain't always beautiful.

What's up?
I'm so mentally exhausted, its not funny. I'm so tired of the way things are going right now. I just want things to be okay.
I miss my mom.
Tomorrow is my last day of school and I that's the only thing I have to look forward to right now.

Life isn't supposed to be like this.


I still remember the first time you told me you loved me. I asked you how you knew, and like always, you had a perfect answer.

I know,

This is my 3rd post in like an hour. Bear with me.


"Sometimes the edge serves
As more than a friend
Than you thought it would be.
And the pages you write
In your journal each night
Are your only release.
And the mask you put on
It's like words in a song.
But there's more to be seen
And the failures you see
Don't seem failures to me here at all.

Oh,I'm begging you no
There's more life left to go.
Oh,I'm begging you please
Cause I don't want you to leave.

Alone as you walk,
Through a crowd and its awkward,
Like nobody sees.
And you can't help but wonder
Would anyone come after you
If you'd leave?
So a pain grows inside,
And a fear comes alive,
Like you'll never be free.
But there's no pain you feel That I know love can't heal here at all.

Oh, I'm begging you no
There's more life left to go.
Oh, I'm begging you please
Cause I don't want you to leave me.
To leave me here on my own.
There's nothing to run from,
Oh There's nothing but fear inside you.
Oh I just hope I can find you,
And tell you that I know you'll smile again.

And every once in awhile,

It still hurts.


Just a daily reminder that I don't have you.

We must free up these tired souls,

Before the sadness kills us both.

Oh what's up?
3 more days of my sophomore year.
And I am so tired of people.

I got a chance to reevaluate the importance of everyone in my life today.
So, yeah.
I really wish I had someone to talk to.



"Try not to miss me when I'm gone"

Ohhhhh, hey!
What is up?

This has been the longest week EVER.
But tomorrow is Friday :D

"If it's love,

And we decide that it's forever, then the rest is just whatever."

Oh, hey.
I gotta lot on my mind.
Here goes.


-I know we love each other. But still. I am so so scared of losing you again. Its not that I don't trust you, its just an insecurity problem that I have.

-I want my family back.

-I miss church.

-I saved two lives today :)

-I have NO idea what I want to do anymore.

Got love?

Yeah, I thought so. Everyone does, right? Cause its just that easy.
Use that four-letter word, and you've got a ticket to absolute happiness.
Yeah, its THAT simple.
Just say it. Say it.

I have been giving a lot of thought to the way everyone reacts to that word.
And I'm not going to lie when I say that I'm amazed at how people can be so inconsiderate.



Don't say it, unless you actually feel it.
Don't say it, just because you think its what you're supposed to say.

Don't say it, just to save yourself.

Woo.

What's up?
Like 8 days of school left?
Ohhh yeah.

I'm ready for my iPhone!
And I'm really ready to spend all my time in Granbury with my best friend :)

Life is so great. Seriously, every day it gets better.

I didn't know it was possible to feel like this.

Somebody sent you a forest..

Oh, hi there.
I'm exhausted, and you are?

Today was Brenton's birthday and I feel horrible that I didn't get to see him, and I probably won't get to see him tomorrow either.
Oh, life is so awesome right now.

Did you hear the ocean singing?

Baby, did you sing along?
As you danced over the water, to some old forgotten song.
Were you even here at all?

Oh, hey.
About my previous blog, I'm sorry about my outburst, but not sorry about my opinion. It just bothers me when people are ignorant, and I really don't want to see you guys ruin your relationship before it even gets started.
Anyways, that's all I have to say about that.

On another note, I'm beginning to realize which friends of mine I can trust. I don't need people around me that talk so bad about people behind their backs then they're just sooo nice to them to their face.
Seriously, if you do that to them, what do you say about me when I'm not around?

Its only Tuesday and it feels like the longest week everrr. I need some best friend time.


Goodnightttt!

SERIOUSLY?

I didn't know you could be in love after 3 days.

'Cause rumor has it,

You love me too :)


Academic banquet, you were my favorite part of the whole entire year. The whole getting dressed up and sitting in a gym, and sweating like crazy really made my year.
Hah. But seriously, it was better than last year.

Anyways, how's it goin?
Things are going quite fabulous if you ask me.
Brenton's birthday is on Thursday then Friday we're going to see Letter's to Juliet :)
I'm so excited!

I am so so happy. I don't think I could say it enough.
Please don't take it away from me.

i've been lookin for ya baby..

Sup?
I had a GREAT weekend.
Now back to reality. I hate schoooool. I'm so ready for summmmer.


I'm so happy :)

Today was a fairytale,

Ah. I love life.
Seriously, it's quite nice right now.

It's 2:00 a.m, and I just got home from seeing Charlie Robison with Brenton.
I had a lot of fun watching drunk people. :)

It seems like there's this one topic that seems to pop up everywhere.. High school, tv, and just about anywhere you turn. Its hard to avoid, and I'm not even going to mention what it is.

In the past 6 months I've made some decisions that I would never take back. Sure, in 25 years I may think "well that was stupid", but still, I would never ever ever change a thing.
I'm so glad that I have an amazing person in my life.

But I still need to clear things up.

Today was a fairytale,

Oh, hey.

Brenton graduated from EMT school yesterday, I am so proud of him. :)

oh.

"It's not always rainbows and butterflies, it's compromise that moves us along."

I am so happy. Happier than I've been in so long. I can't even remember the last time I felt like this. I am so in love with life and almost everything that is going on. I have someone that I love more than anything and I'm lucky to be able to say that they love me the same way.

But of course, not everything can be perfect.
Some things that I've always loved are becoming a chore.
Besides singing, basketball was the first thing I loved to do. It's beginning to feel like something I have to do. I want it back to the way it used to be, but I don't think its going to get there.

Thoughts:
-I'm trying to do everything perfectly just so you will be proud of me. Its a constant struggle.
-I want the old you back. I know it's there somewhere.
-Yeah, I still hate my hair.
-Like 19 days left of school? YES.
-Summer is going to be amazing. Hopefully it will be better than what last summer was supposed to be, if that makes sense to anyone.
-I love you more than anything, please don't ever leave me.
-I am finally at peace.

Lover, lover, lover,

You don't treat me no good no more.

What's up?
My weekend was good. We got first place in our tournament and got a bid to nationals.

I got to spend some time with my best friend today, and he always makes me happy.

I am in love.
That is all.

Goodnight.

You'll always be my baby.

"Time can't erase a feeling this strong."

Oh sup?
I don't have anything to say.

I'm in love.
That is all.