:/

it only hurts when I'm breathing, my heart only breaks when it's beating, my dreams only die when I'm dreaming.
So, I hold my breath to forget.

I feel awful and I have stupid taks tomorrow.
I'm not going to have a good weekend, I can tell you that right now.

I want to believe that everything is going to be okay.

.....

I want to be looked at like I'm the most beautiful thing you've ever seen, even though I'm not.

And if I was running, you'd be the one who I would be running to. And if I was crying, you would be lining the cloud that would pull me through.


This was my summer song.

Do you remember me,

Or how to say my name?

What's up?
Tomorrow is Monday, then I have taks on Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday. Icky.

Then the weekend. Basketball tournament in Granbury..

Then the next week is very busy. Field trip on tuesday, greyhound challenge on wednesday, Brenton's graduation on thursday, and Charlie Robison on saturday.

Woo.

This weekend was GREAT.
Spent all my time with my best friend :)

-Dear random person #7,
I love you. So much. I can't explain to you how much you mean to me. And I know I am so impossible, but you always put up with me. I don't deserve someone like you. You make me happy, and you bring out the best in me.


:) Goodnight.

"I don't have boyfriends"

"Right, you have a best friend. And I'm pretty sure that's way better than anything anyone could ever have."



Good day.
Can't wait until tomorrow :)

Take time to realize,

Well. Kind of a sucky day.

-I don't want to sound like a spoiled brat when I complain about not having my iphone, but seriously, something was taken from me and I deserve to have it back. I check my backpack and athletics bag EVERY day, just to make sure I didn't accidentally leave it in there. I hope whoever had the balls to do this sleeps really well at night.

-I hate my hair. Hate hate hate. I feel so ugly. And I don't want to hear the "but you look beautiful with brown and blonde hair." I don't care, I hate looking in the mirror.

-Honestly, I'm tired of being told what I need to do. I cannot fix some things, and I don't know what to tell some people. You will always have your issues, and please please don't blame them on me.

-Unless I completely misunderstood, I DO have someone that loves me. Don't talk about them like they're going to be gone tomorrow. And don't talk like I'm not important to them. Call me stupid, but I'm pretty sure they care about me more than anything.

-You KNEW I would be like this. When I was in sixth grade you told my mom "she's going to grow up and fall for one person, and she's going to love them forever." Well, here we are. Don't change me.

Goodnight.

*?!@+#!*/

I JUST WANT TO TALK TO YOU.


Sorry.

I swear,

I'm about to run over that xbox.
I still love you.
But seriously.


I need someone to talk to.

i remember,

Every night we spent on weekends, with good friends. We did nothing but it seems like we did so much.

So. How's it goin?
Well its goin, that's for sure.
I want summer to be here. Now.
I really have nothing to say except that I'm awfully bitter and I have a hard time believing I'm a good person because of it.

!

Someday we'll look back and say "look at us now", that's why I keep on loving you.

So. What's up?
This weekend was okay.
We won both of our games yesterday but I still manage to not do enough.
Brenton saved my day, like always. I love spending time with him.

Today was the anniversary of the day everything went bad.
It amazes me how much has changed since then.
When I think about, I realize how lucky I am. I didn't give up, and I got almost everything I wanted. I did what I had to, even though it was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

And no, I don't regret getting hurt.

I don't think I could get any happier.

April 18,

It's been exactly one year.
And look where we are now.


I could not ask for more.

Oh my God.
I could kill.

You've got the curse of curves.

Sup?
I don't really know what the point of this will be, but I'll figure something out.

Congratulations to my spanish 3 people for slaving away on their pinatas :)

The only thing I can really think about is how difficult next year is going to be.
I've heard spanish 3 is hell. And pre-cal probably won't be any better. I have no "blow-off" classes. So yeah. I'm taking student council, but I'm not in the class.

And I'm sorry, but the class ahead of us (juniors) is just plain horrible. A bunch of lazy losers.
And some other words that I really shouldn't say.

The weeks are getting longer and slower. Tuesdays and Thursdays make my week awful. I have no free time.


I'm super excited for summer.
Me, best friend, and Granbury sounds pretty good to me.

What is up?

In case anybody was wondering, I am fabulous, thank you very much.

Besides a few bumps in the road, everything is going quite well.

But you know me, I always have SOMETHING to complain about, so this is my list of things to say :)

1) Don't use my relationship with someone as an excuse for your behavior. "K, thanks :)"

2) If someone disgust SO badly, then maybe, just maybe, that's a sign that you should stop thinking about/talking about them.

3) If you MUST talk badly about someone, get your facts straight. Trust me, you'll sound far less stupid.

4) "you're" the stupidest ex-girlfriend ever! Yay you.

5) In case you're just dying to know, me and my best friend are great. And I don't plan on that changing anytime soon.

Dear random person #7,

I love you,
I hope you know that.

You make me so happy, it's unbelievable.

Something in your eyes,
Makes me want to lose myself. In your arms,
There's something in your voice,
Makes my heart beat fast.
Hope this feeling lasts the rest of my life.
If you knew how lonely my life has been,
And how long I've felt so low If you knew how I wanted someone to come along,
And change my life the way you've done.
Feels like home to me,
Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong.

She said,

You never tell me that you love me anymore, so I can't help but wonder if you do.

arg

Jealousy is a MONSTER.
Ha. Irony.

Please.

Don't let me get in your way.

Where did I go wrong?

I lost a friend.
Somewhere along in the bitterness.

There is nothing worse than not being able to explain yourself.
There is nothing worse than being misunderstood.
There is nothing worse than hurting someone you love more than anything.
There is nothing worse than knowing that the person that you love will probably never be able to look at you the same.
There is nothing worse than,
Regret.

Its a bunch of crap when people say they have no regrets. I guess everyone is just so perfect that they never mess up bad enough to be mad at themselves.

I don't even know where the words came from. It was a stupid situation and I was mad that it seemed like everyone was mad at me, when I didn't do anything.
I said some things I shouldn't have and long story short, I feel like I've ruined everything.

I don't want to be looked at as someone who treats the people they love like crap. I've always been a nice person and I've always given everything I've had to people that deserve it. I've always had a big heart and extreme emotions. They get the best of me a lot, but its never been this bad.

I can't believe I've let myself do this. I hate myself so much right now, I want to throw up.

My eyelids are swollen, and there is the worst pain ever having a party in my stomach.
I am so mentally exhausted but there is no way I'll be able to sleep.
I've got too much to fix.

Call me a name.
Kill me with words.
Forget about me,
It's what I deserve.

I got you, I got you

I didn't know it was possible to want someone so badly.

Loneliest weekend ever.

Granbury sucks alone.

Oh, you're gonna be alright love.

Shine on,
You were made to-
Shine on,
and you know i love you.
And even if we can or can't be friends,
We're gonna be brighter than we've ever been,
So shine on.

Thursdays=longest days ever.

If I told you I was happy, I would be lying.
If I told you I was sad, I would be lying.
So. I'm happysad.

I'm happy that I still have my best friend. But sad that things took a wrong turn.

I am so stressed out about everything right now. Everything seems to be going in the wrong direction.

I have figured out something though!
I'm going to be an engineer.
I've made up my mind.
Well, actually, Mrs. Bruno kinda did.. But whatever.

Okay, I need sleep.
So sweet dreams.
And I still love my best friend.